Remember me for my passion, the paradise that I imagined.

I meant to write in this blog more, but I've failed once again. But since I'm home alone on a random Saturday in March, I figured why not go back to it?

In December, I was in a Zoom meeting and someone who doesn't know me very well asked me, "What are you passionate about?" I said, "Broadway." Later in the call, he told me that when I said it, I didn't sound excited or like I had any feeling. Of course, I stayed true to myself and clapped back in the most respectful way possible, and apologized if that didn't show in my initial response.

I've been lucky to have had a journalism career that has allowed me to turn passion into my job, even though it has bitten me in the ass (and left me to be unemployed) several times, whether it was my fault or not. As I drown in this constant confusion of having no idea what kind of career I want next or who to turn to for help, I've been trying to think about what got me to this point in the first place.

If anyone had told me 6 years ago that I would become an entertainment journalist, I would think they were crazy. I had a friend in college who always thought I was into journalism for some weird reason, and I always thought that meant "hard journalism," like reporting on breaking news stories for a newspaper. At the time, I thought I was going to be a TV producer (that ended up being nothing more than a pipe dream). But when an ad for the BroadwayWorld Contributor program kept popping up for me on social media years after I graduated, I couldn't look away. Do I know how to write? Yes. Do I love theater? Yes. Do I want free tickets to events? Yes.

It was a no-brainer. And it fit me like a glove. Even though it paid nothing, it was more rewarding than any other paying job I've ever had. I interviewed the most amazing people and saw shows I've always wanted to see. I was even able to extend the coverage into another theater outlet to write two paid articles as well. I've pretty much sworn off journalism - at least as a full-time career - but I miss it terribly. I may not miss the reality TV articles I did for other sites afterward because they weren't as fulfilling or meaningful, but this is something I look back on with pride.

I did it for the free tickets, but I stayed for the community I built, joy it brought me, and positive responses from other people. So what do I do now? Do I try to freelance and do more theater articles despite the fact that I have no idea where to turn or what website to go to? I figured since journalism isn't a stable career anymore, I would try to get a job as a copywriter for a theater advertising company but that hasn't worked out for me so far. My career goals may have slightly changed over time, but the one thing that hasn't gone away is my passion for theater. It has remained consistent since I was a kid and has grown even stronger now. I would give my life to the theater if I could. If I could do anything to get one more person to see a Broadway show I love and care about, that would make me happy.

So ask me again... what am I passionate about? BROADWAY. And next time I'll say that with more feeling and excitement than ever before. I may not be a theater journalist right now, but I will jump at the chance to do it again for anyone who will have me.